no te preocupes (: I hope these are alright. It is a long request so I had to write really short ones for some people

•First of all, Jiraiya thinks that sexual education constitutes him taking excerpts from his Icha Icha books and reading it aloud to the class okay

Kakashi blushes because as soon as Jiraiya starts reciting a passage, Kakashi recognizes it. And he’s like…. is Jiraiya-sensei really doing this. Is he really. He’s even more embarrassed that he knows the book word for word though

Naruto is used to enduring Jiraiya’s sex talks, so he just sinks down into his seat and groans. If he was convinced that this would be an interesting discussion, he would listen. But Jiraiya doesn’t make these talks fun at all. It’s not enough to indulge that pervert side of Naruto. He knows this is going to be stupid

Sai is the only one who really listens and takes everything seriously. Probably takes notes. But his sensei will tell him afterward to forget literally everything he’s heard because it’s not right

Neji sits there listening to this, frowning suspiciously every so often. He doesn’t know much about sex, but he’s pretty sure Jiraiya-sensei is not explaining it the right way. You can just see the confusion on his face. And the embarrassment, when Jiraiya gets a little descriptive. Hinata is blushing red the whole time. Jiraiya might ask her what’s wrong at some point, and she can’t even speak. She just blushes harder and shakes her head. Neji just tells her to cover her ears. Kurenai calms her down afterward

Shino zones out after a while. Listen, I headcanon that Shino has his shit together when it comes to sex. He knows what to do. Knows how to do it. He’s just… good. He doesn’t need lessons. So while he’s sitting here listening to Jiraiya blatantly skew a real sex ed lesson, he’s just like nah. I’m out. Tell me when it’s over. I’ll be daydreaming about something else

Kiba comes into this very eager because nice!!! A sex lesson!!! But also a little cocky. He’s 100% sure he knows all there is to know about sex already. Even if he’s still a virgin. Which he probably most definitely is. I don’t know how descriptive I can get with these headcanons. But the first time Jiraiya mentions “the clitoris” Kiba is like…. wtf is that

Rock Lee tries to hard to concentrate because hey. This is a lesson. From Jiraiya-sensei. Even if it’s on sexual education, Lee only thinks it’s appropriate and respectful that he listen. But his eager, determined expression slowly shifts to confusion and he just doesn’t understand what’s happening

Tenten and Sakura are just annoyed. Why do they have to sit here and listen to a perverted old man talk about this?? Talk about female anatomy?? And not even give them the right information either???

Ino tries really hard to listen because she thinks she might get some good info out of this. But after a while she’s just in shock. Once Jiraiya passes out a list (with visuals) of the ‘best’ sex positions, she’s done. She’s so embarrassed 

Shikamaru was done before he even walked into the room. He’ll fall asleep. It’s the only way he can see to escape the dumb lecture. His dad probably had the talk with him anyway, so he’s good 

Choji was enduring it until Jiraiya took out the banana

Jiraiya figured he needed to explain erections. And the issues that some people might have with erections. Jiraiya literally “You see this? This is a banana”

and Sai nods like. Ah yes. That’s a banana. Of course. I know what that is. *Sketches the banana*

Jiraiya proceeds to take out a condom (did they have condoms in Naruto?? Idk) “This is how you put on a condom”

Jiraiya proceeds to struggle with putting on this condom. Probably breaks it bc he stretches it too much 

He quickly moves on from that and then… He gets a rotten banana that’s sagging. “Sometimes you won’t be able to put a condom on, and the… penis will look like this. In which case, all you have to do is—” and Kurenai stops the lesson at that point